Profit and Loss
“Always look on the bright side of life.”
Being alone, especially at this time of year, makes me introspective, and, considering everything else that’s going on, I’ve been even more introspective than normal. I always try to find the good in things and people. It’s not always easy, but, still, I try.
Last night, I found myself thinking about a book I read at the suggestion of my wife: Perfume by Patrick Suskind. It’s a story about a man who imagines, remembers, and “sees” the world via scent. He becomes a famous perfumer, hence the name of the book, but also falls into despair and pain. But, what I took away from the book was a sense of enjoyment, especially of the sensual world. Last night, thinking of the book made me remembe not to take the little pleasures for granted. (In this case, the feeling of nice, cool sheets with a medium to high thread-count.) If not for my wife, I never would have gained that insight.
And, there are other things, too. I’ll always treasure her wonderful cooking. I used to love to cook, and I’m sure I will again, but I’ll never cook the way she cooked for me. It’s something I will always remember with a smile.
Trying to figure out how she did things on websites improved my own HTML crafting ability. I’m sure I’ll never be as good as she is, but, then, it’ll never be my “bread and butter”, either.
Most importantly, however, is the fact that my wife is responsible for my renewed interest in my personal spirituality. If not for her, I would never have started working on that part of my life. Ironically, I never thought we saw eye-to-eye on that particular subject. As far as I know, she’s pursueing her own spirtiality, in her own way. It’s a very different path than mine, but I’m thankful that she seems to be in a place where she can explore that. For her sake, I hope it’s something that she maintains. I know that if I didn’t keep asking spiritual questions in my own life, I’d surely be dead now.
So, despite the pain and the sense of loss, I can still find things to be thankful for in all this. I’m grateful that can still find some of the profit amongst the loss.
