Diary of a Network Geek

The trials and tribulations of a Certified Novell Engineer who's been stranded in Houston, Texas.

11/25/2007

A Cold

Filed under: Criticism, Marginalia, and Notes,Deep Thoughts,Life, the Universe, and Everything,Personal — Posted by the Network Geek during the Hour of the Pig which is in the late evening or 10:23 pm for you boring, normal people.
The moon is Waxing Gibbous

I’m sure that’s all it is.

I’ve been coughing again, like I was last year about this time.  I’m sure I’ve just caught a cold and the cough will go away soon.  I’m sure it’s not like last year.  I’m sure I won’t start coughing blood.  Everyone at work has been sick, it seems, so I’m sure that I’ve just caught one of their colds.  I end up at everyone’s desk, after all.  If anyone is going to catch something, it would be me.  Sure, I got a flu shot this year, but there’s that super cold going around.  I’m sure that’s all it is.

But, I’m afraid.
I started to cough and spit in the sink to see if there was pink in it.  I started to wonder how I’d make it through another year of chemotherapy.  Knowing what it’s like now, I started to be afraid of the cough, of what it might mean.
I have an appointment with a cardiologist Thursday to monitor my blood thinner and my high-blood-pressure medication.  I go in for a scan on December 10th, which is a Monday.  But, if I’m not significantly improved by the end of the coming week, I’ll make an appointment to see another doctor about my cold, or whatever it is.

I don’t think it’s my cancer come back, but I’m afraid anyway.


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