Diary of a Network Geek

I wish I hadn’t gotten out of the habit of writing every day.

But, well, life happened. I got a job which became a career which quickly became a life that included responsibilities like car payments and mortgage payments and health insurance. Not to mention a wife and kid, followed by a divorce, health problems and the bills that come with it, and a new wife and all that entails. At some point in there, there just wasn’t time for writing. Now, I’ve lost the habit of it. My schedule revolves around trying to work off the extra weight I put on eating all the delicious food my blushing bride makes me and trying to get to work on time.
Yes, I do manage to write these weekly notes with a few free links in them, but, honestly, that’s not really writing. Not the way I mean it.
But, if you’re like me and you harbor that hard-to-kill dream of one day writing again, this week’s links are for you, starting with Get Back Into Writing by a blogger who calls herself Verily Mary. I haven’t read the other resources she promised, but you may find her encouraging words, well, encouraging. One thing that might help is knowing that if you write 750 words per day, you’ll have written about three pages worth of whatever you’re working on. And, if you need help staying motivated to do that, you can try using the on-line app 750 Words. It’s based on some ideas found in The Artist’s Way and will give you stats on your writing which you may, or may not, find inspiring. And, everything you write, they claim, will stay private.
Finally, if you do get a manuscript produced, Lara Willard has some great advice on formatting your manuscript for submittal in the modern world.

Beyond that, there’s no substitute for sitting down and doing the work. Maybe one day I can get back to that. Knowing that my blushing bride supports me will help, for sure, but she can’t do the work for me. I have ideas, one day maybe my life will slow down enough that I can share them.
Until then, keep coming back here for more of whatever this is!

This post originally appeared on Use Your Words.

You know what I really miss about being married?

No, it’s not the sex. Though, I have to admit, a little nookie now and then sure takes the edge off. Funny thing about that, though… See, all the sex advice therapist type folks, like Dr. Ruth and Dr. Drew and so on, they all say that sex is supposed to get better the longer you’re in a relationship, right? You get to know each other’s moods and needs and wants. The communication is supposed to be better, so getting to the “good stuff” is supposed to get easier, right? Yeah, funny thing about that, in my marriage, not so much. In fact, the harder I worked at that, the worse the sex got. Hmm, have to sort that one out in therapy. So, anyway, it’s not the regular, two-person sex that I miss.
Nor is it her cooking. Oh, don’t get me wrong, my ex-wife is a great cook, when she wants to be. Might not be very imaginative or creative, and maybe she sticks a little closer to the recipe than I do, but what she did turn out was always, without fail delicious. And filling. In fact, at the end, I’ve seen e-mail wherein she told her new paramour that she was trying to a) keep me happy by feeding me well (didn’t quite work, though the meals were to die for!) and b) kill me with high-cholesterol meals (obviously, since I’ve lost 8 pounds in the past three weeks, that didn’t quite work either). Besides, I’m really enjoying my own cooking. My Near Eastern Spicy Chicken L’Orange fairly melts in your mouth. Trust me! And the beer bread I made for Thanksgiving keeps getting me invited back, year after year. Though, honestly, most folks like my sourdough best. And, I’ve started another sourdough starter just this week. So, it’s not the super delicious food, either.
No, what I miss is something I used to call “Snuggle Time”.
See, my ex could never stand sleeping with someone touching her, which I always wanted. I tried to get her to fall asleep resting her head on my chest, listening to my love drum hammer out its steady beat, but she’d never go for it. Instead, what we settled on was Snuggle Time. After I’d finally put down my book, turn out the light and slide under the covers, I’d slip over to her side of the king-size bed we shared and try to melt into her. She’d grab my hand like a little girl holding her teddybear, tucking our little combined fist under her chin while we “spooned”. And, for five or ten or, if I was lucky, fifteen minutes, I’d get to feel close to that tender, soft, curvy mystery that is woman. It was the best part of the day. For a few minutes, I’d know that ten-hour days, late shifts, missed meals, extra hours on the weekend, being on-call 24/7, skipped books, or software and computers that I decided I could live without were all worth it, because for five or ten or, if God loved me extra that day, fifteen minutes, I could feel truly worthwhile and content and in love. It was better than sex and more important than food, those few minutes of Snuggle Time. I’d forego either, or both, for a few extra minutes of Snuggle Time.

So, you see, the mean, old bear of a tattooed, crusty computer geek has a soft side.
Makes you feel all mushy inside, don’t it?

Well, I’m trying to keep busy, anyway.
I went to a Lodge meeting tonight with a friend of mine. In fact, I sat in the South for his Third Degree, until I had to excuse myself because I was passing a kidney stone. That’s always a good excuse, by the way. I got there in time for dinner, which meant some good, heavy Texas BBQ. Masons sure know how to eat! Of course, now, I need to cut way back and try to lose the five pounds I gained while eating greasy food on the road last week. Curse you and your delicious food Applebee’s! And Olive Garden!
Okay, I probably could have eaten healthier than that, but the Messiah is a bit of a picky eater. I’m a bit more adventurous than straight “meat and potatoes”, but I made due. So, now it’s back to rice and chicken and tuna and other lighter fare. Hmm, maybe it’s time I started trying out those sushi and bento cookbooks….
Oh, I’ve also been in touch with H.O.P.E.. Apparently, they have to review your volunteer application before you can actually volunteer. It surprised me a bit, but I was glad they did. Of course, they were quite thorough when we adopted Hilda, too. I’m a bit of a shoe-in, though, because I’m a “big, strong man”, who are short supply amongst volunteers. Who knew? So, that’ll get me out of the house more often, too.
And, there’s always church. It’s nice to get out again and do these things I never felt I could do before. It’s really nice not being responsible to anyone for a change. I can’t remember the last time I didn’t feel like I had to “check in” with someone to let them know what I was up to, or where I was going. If I feel like it, these days, I just go. Like I said, it’s nice. And, I hope keeping active will help me keep the weight off, too!