Damn, I could really use a cigarette.
So, the other day, I’m talking with my therapist and he points out an interesting “coincidence”. The women who appreciate me most are all pretty well unavailable. Damn if he’s not right. Let me break it down.
First, there are the married women. Mostly, the unhappily married women, or at least married women who seem to be missing something in their marriage that I seem to have, or so they think. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m in touch with my feelings and can actually express them. Maybe it’s that I’m not obsessed with sports or some other distracting hobby, other than blogging, of course. Maybe it’s just that I pay attention to them, while their partners, who see them every day, don’t. Maybe it’s just that they don’t know me.
Damn, I could really use a cigarette.
Then, of course, there are the divorced women. Sure, they’re available, but, they either have no time for me or they fall into the next demographic group. Again, I think all the same things apply from the first. The divorced women who find me interesting, I think, must see in me everything that their ex-husbands were not. At least, I hope that’s it and, hey, it’s a working theory until one of them straightens me out, right?
Damn, I could really use a cigarette.
Next, there are all the nice, young, attractive women in distant lands. Anywhere from Oklahoma to New York to Denver to the Phillipines to Japan. Anywhere, in short, that’s too damn far to drive to from Houston. Now, really, I did not start this blog almost six years ago looking to “hook up”, okay? I started the whole thing as a marketing ploy to boost my ranking in Google. It worked, too. But, along the way, I got married, then divorced, and found myself with a largely female readership. At the time, I thought it was great. A lovely turn of events. Turns out, not so much. So many of the most interesting women were all, well, rather unreachable. Not out of my league, or anything so narrow-minded or self-limiting as all that, but out of my reach geographically. Yeah, great. So, the girls in far off places think I “look fine” and write well and have interesting hobbies or whatever. That’s great, but I don’t exactlly get to the Phillipines for coffee, you know?
Damn, I could really use a cigarette.
And, really, this is not for lack of trying here, kids. I have tried to find someone local. Really. Stepped way, way, way outside my comfort zone to ask out ladies from on-line. Tried the Bookstore Method more than once, but with similar results. Even looked around at church, but, as I told someone via e-mail, I “love the Lord” and everything, but, well, I don’t think I want to double-date with Him, you know? I’m sure that whole “water-to-wine” trick is great at parties, but, crown of thorns sort of puts people off. Anyway, it just seems to me like the more available a woman is, the less interested she is in me.
So, anyone care to tell me where I’m making my mistakes? What am I doing wrong here?
Damn, I could really use a cigarette.