Diary of a Network Geek

In honor of the first Friday of NaNoWriMo, I’m bringing you a free writing tool and not from my usual main site.

This week, I’m originating my regular Friday Fun Post from JKHoffman.com, where I hope to move most of my more creative work, instead of my regular Diary of a Network Geek.
If you’ve given serious thought to writing, you have probably heard of both National Novel Writing Month, AKA NaNoWriMo, and a writer’s program called Scrivener.  Personally, I’ve done most…
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So, here it is, almost time for Halloween Party weekend and you don’t have a costume?

What to do, what to do, eh?  Well, if  you have a t-shirt that you’re willing to sacrifice and a modicum of creative ability, and an iPhone or iPad or Android device, then you may be in luck.  Gizmodo covered a buy last year who used a pair of iPads to make a costume which seemed like he had a hole in his chest.  That was pretty awesome.  Well, after spending some time working on some Mars Rover project you may have heard about, that guy, Mark Rober, is back with a slightly less expensive alternative.  Rober and his team at DigitalDudz have come up with a pretty amazing app that lets you make a creative costume pretty cheap.  In fact, the app itself is free and, basically, consists of some pretty cool and creepy animations that you can combine with an old t-shirt, or one of the custom ones that they sell relatively cheap, to make a pretty cool costume.
The basic app is pretty amazing, but it does have “upgrades” which will cost a couple bucks more and, I have to admit, the t-shirts that they sell at DigitalDudz are better than anything I can whip up, even if I wasn’t in a hurry, but, hey, beggars can’t be choosers at this late date.

Anyway, it is a cool app and a cool idea.  Maybe for next year for me, though.
But, hey, it’s Friday, so why not check it out!  (And, no, I don’t get any money for those links.  I just liked it, so I linked it.)

What do  you wear under your Halloween costumes?

So, yeah, Halloween is just around the corner and that has me thinking about costumes.  Well, to be honest, costumes for adults, because, let’s face it, in all our repressed, Puritanical, American, adult bodies, live crazy hedonists that just want to dress up in silly, or sexy, costumes and parade around like the goofballs we all pretend we are NOT.  And, maybe because I have a girlfriend for the first time in ages, I’ve been thinking about what one wears underneath that superhero costume.

As it turns out, DC Comics has just the thing for that; sexy, adult superhero underwear and swimwear.  (And, if the number of times “adult” has appeared so far in this post isn’t a clue, some links here may not be completely safe for work, if you work in a repressive enough environment.)  And, yes, there are options for the guys as well as the ladies there.
For you Marvel fans, they have something more along the lines of sleepwear.  (And, apparently, only for the ladies to wear.  Sorry!)

So, now you have something to think about this weekend.  And, hopefully share with your significant other without getting into trouble!

Do you hear music when you read?

No, I don’t mean, “Do play music while you read?”, but, rather, do you hear music, like a movie soundtrack while you read a book?  I know for awhile, I was so immersed in movies and the movie experience that I couldn’t help hearing certain kinds of background noise and sound effects when I read certain kinds of books.  But, what if that happened on purpose?  What if you had a way to synchronize an actual soundtrack, complete with mood music and sound effects, with the book you were reading?

Well, if you read books on your Mac, PC, iPad, iPhone or Android-based e-reader, you actually can, thanks to Booktrack.  They’ve developed an app that will run on all those platforms which will adapt a soundtrack for your book, complete with sound effects, to how fast you read.  The download is free and I’m not sure if there’s a “training period” where the app learns your regular reading speed, but I sure do like the idea!  I’m sure the selection of books is a little limited right now, but, with any luck, more people will show interest and more books will get added to their list.

So, what the heck, it’s Friday!  Turn your volume down and go check it out!

No, that’s not spelled incorrectly.

So, back in July, I had the amazing opportunity to go to DEFCON 20 in Las Vegas.  It was quite a historic event; the twentieth anniversary of the biggest, baddest, most talked about computer security convention ever.  Though, of course, I’m using that term somewhat euphemistically.  I heard about DEFCON shortly after getting started in the IT industry and have wanted to go ever since.  Like I mentioned last week, I’m a pretty big fan of sub-cultures and security and, well, DEFCON is the event of the year for an intersection of those two things.  Yes, I’m talking about hackers.

Now, before you assume that I’m off breaking the law, hackers aren’t all bad.  Hackers are just people who think very far outside the box when it comes to things like computers and technology and security.  In fact, most hackers will tell you that they’re interested in improving security by trying to break it.  And, that’s definitely a philosophy I share.  Until you know your security can withstand an assault, frankly, you don’t know how good it really is.
And, as anyone worth their salt at security will tell you, physical access is the first step.  If you can lock people out of your system and keep them from gaining any kind of access, well, that’s a secure system.  If you think I’m exaggerating, well, you’ll just have to trust me when I tell you that the most important data isn’t available from just any networked computer.  To get to it means getting past a locked door.  So, what, then, is the first step in testing security?  Testing locks.

And, yes, while at DEFCON I learned the basics of lockpicking.  It’s not actually illegal, unless I’m trying to bypass a lock to which I do not have permission to test, and carrying the tools for it isn’t illegal, unless I’m trespassing with them, in which case they become burglar’s tools and a different class of felony altogether.  But, I’m only interested in the skill for informational and entertainment purposes.  Trust me.
If you’re interested in exploring the world of “locksport”, there are people who can help and you don’t even have to go to DEFCON to get it.  Just head over to The Open Organization Of Lockpickers‘ website and take a look.  (Yes, that’s TOOOL, for short.)  They have slideshows that explain the basics as well as links to books and sites where you can buy the tools you need to try your hand at lockpicking.  It’s loads of fun!  Honest!

So, go check them out and enjoy your weekend!
(But, don’t call me for bail money if you get in trouble!)

Pretty much anything can be turned into a weapon.

Regular readers here will know that I’m not only security and safety conscious, but into, well, some of the stranger aspects of culture.  If there’s an obscure method of self-defense, or a strange sub-culture, I probably know about it.  I tend to be that way with obscure and rare books, too.  But, when all three of these things overlap?  It’s like nerdvana for me!
And such a confluence of material and subjects exist: Cards as Weapons by Ricky Jay.

You probably have seen Ricky Jay in the movies, believe it or not, even if you may not have recognized him.  He’s been in a number of movies by David Mamet, but as a character actor, you may not associate his name with his face.  Either way, Ricky Jay is quite well known in the stage magic world and is one of the best card technicians who’s ever practiced the art.  His book, which retails for an amazing sum on [amazon_link id=”0446387568″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Amazon[/amazon_link], on the deadly art of card throwing is well known in some of the circles I’ve brushed up against in my varied and misspent youth.  But, it’s been so hard to find and expensive that few of us have ever actually read it.  Now, thanks to a, possibly pirated, copy that’s up on Scribd, you can download the entire PDF for free.  Free!  So, if  you like magic, or cards, or Ricky Jay, or obscure books, or strange self-defense weapons, or even just knowing cool, strange things, then download this book!  While you still can!

Besides, it’s Friday and you’re reading my blog.  What else have you got to do?

What if a book slowly faded away as you read it?

I like to read.  No, really, I do.  Sure the last couple years I’ve been pretty busy and I haven’t read nearly as much as I used to read in the “old days”, but I do still love to read.  Most of the time, I grind right through a book at a pretty steady pace, never really stopping until I finish it.  Every once in awhile, though, I do get stuck.  For whatever reason, a book may not grab me and hold my attention or get to a slow part and I’ll lose interest.  So, what if there was a way to add a sense of urgency to reading?

Well, that’s just what El Libro que No Puede Esperar, which translates as ‘The Book that Cannot Wait’, does, it makes you hurry, because, truly, the book cannot wait.  It’s a collection of stories by Latin American authors that’s printed in disappearing ink.  The book slowly starts to fade as soon as the sealed, plastic package is opened and will vanish completely in about two months, leaving an exceptionally well crafted blank book.  In fact, people who buy the book are encouraged to use it as a journal after the original ink disappears completely.

So, what about it?  Would “The Book That Cannot Wait” keep you motivated to read faster?  Or just seem like a waste of paper?
Well, either way, you can hit that link and see photos of the book, both sealed and with ink disappearing.  Go ahead and take a look.  It is, after all, Friday and you weren’t doing anything anyway!

I’ve always wanted a post-modern, surrealist pet.

Hermit crabs have always kind of fascinated me.  I’ve had one or two over the years, mostly as a kid.  They’re pretty fascinating at first.  Think about it for a minute.  A terrestrial crab that uses the discarded shells of other creatures for a home.  Pretty weird, right?  Well, ever since I first saw these crazy, little creatures, I’ve thought it would be cool to put them into clear shells so you could see just what was going on inside.  Apparently, I’m not the only one.

Artist/designer Robert DuGrenier has been making glass Hermit crab shells for Hermit Crabs to live in for more than 15 years.  And, now, he’s offering them for sale, too.  So, yes, now we can actually have the crazy hermit crab of the future with a see-through shell.

For real, go look at these and, if you are interested at all, buy some!  (No, I don’t get a cut!  I just think they’re cool!)  Besides, it’s Friday, why not have a little fun wasting time?

A “mecha” or “mech” is a high-tech, man-shaped killer robot suit, popular in science-fiction.

In fact, you may be more familiar with them as “robot armor” or “robot tanks” even, depending on your particular flavor of sci-fi.  For those of us who are, or have been, hardcore Japanese animation junkies, however, they will always be mecha.  And, believe you me, many of the faithful fanboys have dreamed of owning a mecha like this and doing battle with giant, alien invaders just like in [amazon_link id=”B0000639E0″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Neon Genisis Evangelon[/amazon_link] or [amazon_link id=”B005DTGAQQ” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Robotech[/amazon_link].  The problem is, of course, no one actually makes these giant battle suits.  Until now….

Now, thanks to the ultra-hard-core Japanese otaku group Suidobashi Heavy Industry, you, too can buy your very own mehca!  (For the low price of $1.3 million.)
So, start saving those nickels, dimes and quarters now!  (And start placing bets on how long before these actually find their way into real combat somewhere!!)

Well, okay, it might be out of my price range, but, it’s Friday, right?  Who can hold a sweet, Friday day-dream against me?
(Seriously, though, check that link, the video there is pretty awesome!)

Yes, I’m a little obsessed with money this month.

No, it’s not because I can’t pay my bills.  Rather, it’s about work.  Now, for the most part, I enjoy my work.  I find it challenging, but not too challenging, and interesting and the pay is pretty good.  Also?  I have a ten-minute commute.  Hard to beat that!  But, the reality is, at heart, I’m a lazy bastard.  If I could skate by without working another day in my life, I totally would do that.  For real.
The problem with that, of course, is paying all those bills.  So, how to do it?  What kind of money do I need to be able to tell the world to, essentially, and pardon my language, “Fuck off”.  (Yes, what I’m talking about is commonly referred to as “Fuck You Money”.)  So, what would that take?  I don’t need to live like a king, but, to not work, I will need to keep getting money somehow, like through investments.  But, the question is, how much will it take and what kind of investment do I have to make to keep it coming steadily enough to pay the bills?

Luckily, a smarter gentleman than I, Nilesh Trivedi, has posted an Excel spreadsheet that will help you calculate just how much you need to start with and how good your investment needs to be so that you never have to answer to another boss again.  Download that, and read his explanation, here: How Much Is Enough? : A Formula for FU Money.  (And, if  you’re like me, you’ll start by saving the money you might have spent on Microsoft Office and open that spreadsheet in LibreOffice instead!)

So, there’s a little something to think about while you wait for the weekend! Enjoy!

Advice from your Uncle Jim:
"If God is for us, who can be against us?"
   --Romans 8:31 (NIV)