Diary of a Network Geek

Stop laughing.

Okay, so this is totally no joke. Marketing people now use sex to sell absolutely everything. Even hacking. Yes, over at SexyHacking.com they have hot chicks dispensing computer security information and techniques. Really. And, apparently, they were supposed to be at Blackhat, one of the big security conferences in Vegas, this year, too.  Not sure if they actually were or not.
Well, thank you, to the Security Monkey for pointing this out to us.

So, sex sells. Go figure.
(Oh, and don’t forget, today is “Talk Like A Pirate Day“.)

Okay, that title is kind of a lie.

I want you to review Fables.
Yeah, seriously. I’ll give you a capsule synopsis, but that’s it.
Okay, so it’s a comic book, first in a series, that were later collected into graphic novels, written by comics genius Bill Willingham. The idea is simple, really. What if the classic fairy tales got lost or kicked out of fairy-tale-land and ended up here, in our world, someplace like New York City? What would that look like? What would they do? What kind of problems would they have? How would their stories change?

That’s it. That’s Fables. As with all good pushers, D.C. under their Vertigo line, is offering the first one free. Hit the link and find the free one at the bottom of the page.
Enjoy. Review.

Fiction writers may have thirty-six plots to choose from, but bloggers only have seven posts.

According to humorist Lore Sjöberg, all blog posts fall into one of seven categories. I would like to refute this assertion, but, alas, I don’t think I can. Even on my own blog! In short, those seven categories are 1) Be Upset about X! 2)Buy Product X! 3)Animals are Cute! 4)People are Dumb! 5)Something I like, but Different! 6)Weird Science! and 7)It’s ALL about Me, the Blogger! Okay, now, keeping those seven categories in mind, where did your last seven posts fit? Yeah, c’mon, admit it. He’s right! Curse you, Lore Sjöberg!

BabylonAD

Originally uploaded by Network Geek

I saw Babylon A. D. this weekend.

It wasn’t bad.
Actually, it was pretty good. Naturally, starring Vin Diesel, it was an action film, but that’s not a bad thing at all. The premise was that Diesel was a mercenary in a post Apocalyptic world, delivering a special girl from a nunnery in Tibet to New York. He’s hired by a Russian gangster, in some burned out version of a future Russia. Oddly, the Russian is played by a Frenchman, Gerard Depardeu, who wears a totally extraneous bit of facial appliance. Not sure what the point of that was, honestly. It was sort of strange, actually. So, in any case, this Russian gangster does all his business from a modified armored personnel carrier, because that’s the level of violence the world has reached, apparently. He airlifts Diesel’s character in a Russian knock-off of a Mercedes and drops him in front of the Tibetan nunnery, where he meets Michelle Yeoh’s character. She plays a nanny, of sorts, to the very special girl who was an orphan of some kind and needs to be delivered safely to New York City in six days.

Obviously, there are people trying to stop Diesel and Yeoh from getting the girl to NYC. That, in fact, is the basis for what seems to pass for a plot for most of the movie. It’s all about getting past all the barriers and obstacles to the Big Apple.

There are a few things that are a bit of a surprise, but, mostly, it’s a fairly predictable movie-length chase. There is a plot, of sorts, but it’s so thin that it seems more like a sub-plot than anything. And, it never really seems to get resolved, to me. It just suddenly ends. I mean, one minute, there’s this massive action scene and then… Poof! The movie is over. It’s really bizarre. It’s almost like there was an hour cut out of the movie that explains the ending or something. Really strange.

Oddly enough, the small point of not having an ending doesn’t really make it a bad movie. A little odd perhaps, but not bad at all. In fact, it’s a pretty good movie. It’s not Dark Knight, but it’s not bad, either. In fact, I might be willing to see it again, just to try and figure it all out!
So, in short, if you like science-fiction movies, or Vin Diesel, or just plain action films, it’s worth seeing at least once.

Yes, you read that right, The Five Worst Things About Surviving Cancer.

When Kat asked me to write a guest post for the Canard Collective, this was the first topic that jumped to mind. Well, actually, to be fully honest, my first thoughts were about how much easier it would be to write about the five best things about, well, almost anything. The five best things about being divorced, for instance, or being unemployed or… Well, you get the idea. But, then, being the contrarian that I am, I thought about this. You know, people always think when you survive a major illness, or, as I like to say, cheat death, that your troubles are over. But, gentle readers, I’m here to tell you that it is not so. Surviving is just the beginning of the problems.

So, go over to the Collective and read what I wrote.  Then laugh at how different it is from all the other stuff that people did guest posts about.

Advice from your Uncle Jim:
"People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes."
   --Abigail Van Buren

Just in case the NSA isn’t already watching me…

While chasing a link for something else, I found a site that tells you how to register with the ATF to legally make and own a silencer. This seems impossible to me, but, well, if you follow the links you can get the forms for yourself! What a country!

Yeah, I know this is later than normal, but I gave you two things on Tuesday, so I figure we’re even.

Well, as you know I’ve been searching for new music. At least, music that’s new to me, because, you know, I was told that Snow Patrol is, well, mainstream and old hat and whatever other cliche you want to squeeze in here. So, I put a poll up over in the sidebar and hoped for the best. Now, for those of you who don’t know me in life, you might be a little surprised by how eclectic and varied my choices in music can be. For instance, in my car right now, I have Warren Zevon’s last CD, a Frank Sinatra collection, Snow Patrol, Bowling For Soup, Green Day, Sheryl Crow, Cherry Poppin’ Daddies, Rob Zombie and Nina Simone, just to name a few. In fact, I went from listening to Rob Zombie to Sheryl Crow in an afternoon. So, my point is, I’m pretty open. I usually say I don’t listen to Rap or Country, but, honestly? If someone presents something interesting enough, I’ll try it. Seriously.

In any case, I wasn’t satisfied with the responses I was getting on my poll (vote early, vote often!), so I started doing more research. I got a book called The Pocket DJ. It’s been around a little while, but I figured it would still lead me places I hadn’t been. Also, there’s this writing exercise where you build a playlist for your various characters, to try and get inside their heads and feel how they feel through music. I sort of figured that I could go in the other direction and pick playlists from the book then build the character from that. You know, getting twice the use of the book by cranking my musical IQ up a few points and getting some writing exercises at the same time. I’ll get back to you on both.

Either way, though, there was a section in the back of the book that listed a bunch of music blogs. So, naturally, I sat down not too long ago and started chasing links. Some didn’t interest me and some had either moved or shutdown or shutdown just as I found them. At least one blogger announced that she was shutting down her blog to become a full-time music journalist not more than a week after I bookmarked it! Of the ones that survived, though, I’ve got three for you.
First, there’s Sixeyes MP3 Blog, with regular posts and free MP3s in every post! Yea! They’re mostly indy stuff, but kind of all over the place, too.
Then there’s Fluxblog! with almost daily posts and, again, free MP3s in every post, sometimes podcasts with music, too. Yea free! I mean, seriously, you can fill your entire iPod with free MP3s of popular and new music from this blog alone!
Finally, there’s Stereogum with many, many posts, at least one daily, lots of performers from overseas and many posts with videos or MP3s. Yea regularity! Oh, my middle-age is showing! Seriously, these folks love music and it shows in sheer volume of posts, if not the intensity of each review.

Also, a friend, Marc Garvin of Pulling Strings, the great Houston-based public radio show about classical guitar and similar stringed instruments (Correction!  Marc e-mailed me and said the show features “the sounds of “Picked, plucked and strummed” (sometimes “banged, bashed and hammered”) instruments.”  So, you know, it’s even better than what I said.) suggested some of these very cool and different performers when he caught wind of my search for something new to add to my rotation. Even though these links are all about the music, they’re brought to you via YouTube.
Jake Shimabukuro on the Ukulele. This is definitely worth looking at and listening to. He does things with a ukulele that have to be heard, and seen, to be believed!
Kaki King playing the guitar in such a way as to get percussion. Okay, the video is a little strange and disjointed, but I really like this sound. It’s kind of the latest version of a performer singing with their instrument. Open mike night taken to a super-high professional level, you know?
Joscho Stephan, also playing the guitar. This is a more Country, or Appalachian, sound to me than I’d have expected from Marc, seeing as he’s a Classical guy, but, I have to admit, it’s got a certain energy to it that really works!  (Update!  Marc told me that “Joscho is a “gypsy jazz” guitarist in the style of Django Reinhardt.” So, that should make it more clear to those of you who are more musically well-versed than I.  And, by that I mean, everyone in the world.)

Finally, if you want to find any of the music that’s been mentioned here, or elsewhere on my blog, I suggest trying SeeqPod, the playable search engine. I’ve mentioned it before, but it bears repeating in this context. One of the great features here is the “Discover” feature that lets you discover songs that SeeqPod thinks are close to what you’ve been searching for in style. Sometimes some really interesting stuff comes up in that.

So, there you have it. As promised, more than one new resource for new music.
Also, for those interested, yes, I did buy the newest Snow Patrol CD, but don’t let that stop you from voting in the poll because I’ll be buying more music eventually.
Oh, yeah, one more thing… Don’t forget that next week I’ll be doing a guest post on someone else’s blog. I’ll have an announcement the day it’s supposed to go live on that site.

Advice from your Uncle Jim:
"When I'm working on a problem I never think about beauty. I think only of how to solve the problem. But, when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong."
   --R. Buckminster Fuller

No, I have not started smoking again.

Regular readers may be familiar with my obsession with smoking. Or, rather, my fixation on the fact that I’d love a good smoke, but, having cheated cancer-related death once already, feel that it would be more than a little foolish to so dramatically increase the chances of getting cancer, again, that I just can’t justify lighting up again. Naturally, I still think about it and ways to reduce the craving and/or sublimate the urge with a similar experience. Well, I think I have the perfect solution: the electronic cigarette.

No, I am not making that up. Go ahead, click the link. I’ll wait.

See? Now, I think it’s really meant as a device to help you stop smoking, not continue the habit while cheating death, but, still… Of course, at $90+ shipping, I won’t be getting one any time soon. But, oh, what a glorious idea. It may not be a jet-pack, but an electronic cigarette is retro science-fiction to me. I love it!

I hadn’t really planned on taking a vacation this year.

I mean, between all the time I took last year for chemotherapy and my lack of funds due to paying for all that, well, I just hadn’t planned on taking any time for myself this year. Oh, maybe the occasional long weekend, but that was about it. But, after reading this article on Hotjobs about taking time away from work… Well, let’s just say I’m reconsidering it. (And, no, the potential of winning a free trip to Tahiti, also on that article I linked to, did not have any influence over me!)

That first article suggests taking time off, even if you don’t leave the house, but just stay home and read. That was what got the wheels turning in my head. I have this giant stack of books, again, and I never seem to have enough time to read. I could take two or three days before a weekend and just read all day long. Heck, I could probably even do it more than once! Oh, the joy of a day spent reading…
Then, too, there was an article on the New York Times, linked to by LifeHacker, suggesting a number of less expensive vacations one might take. Though, I have to admit, the comments left by other readers were just as good as the article and, in most cases, less expensive than anything suggested by the Times. I particularly liked the idea of taking several days and being a tourist in your own town. There are so many things in Houston that I haven’t done! I’ve lived here ten years and I’ve never seen the San Jacinto Monument, for instance. And, there are so many museums! In fact, I even know someone who used to curate at the Menil. I could probably talk him into acting as a guide for me.
And, now that I have such a nice camera, think of all the opportunities to explore and take pictures.

Advice from your Uncle Jim:
"Good habits are not made on birthdays, nor Christian character at the New Year. The workshop of character is everyday life. The uneventful and commonplace hour is where the battle is lost or won."

No, this is not a new dance craze.

I have this little problem. I use programs that are, well, somewhat experimental and which occasionally crash. But, I’m also a little anal retentive and like to have my workspace setup the same way on my computer all the time. Usually, that means have to shut down certain programs and restart others in a particular order to get the icons lined up right on my taskbar. Well, now, I don’t have to worry. Why is that, you ask? Simple, because I found Taskbar Shuffle on ZDNet Downloads.

This free program lets you do what I’ve been lusting after for a while now: reorder the icons on your taskbar in Windows 2000/XP/Vista. That’s it. That’s all it does.
And I think it’s wonderful.